


I was scared of heights before I fell for you

by Felixseo (kafkao)



Series: a kiss... as in ...? [5]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-02-01 04:58:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21387331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kafkao/pseuds/Felixseo
Summary: Kissing Changbin is like breathing the flames of a burning fire; Felix feels like he’s allowed them to consume his entire being until he’s left numb to his toes. Changbin kisses Felix like he’ll never be able to show his love again except through this very action alone- like he must put all his passion and intensity into every kiss to make it worthwhile. And it’s nice, it’s pleasant, but Felix sometimes feels like he needs to remind the other that he’sright there,and he isn’t going anywhere until he’s told to.orall the excuses Changbin uses to kiss Felix
Relationships: Lee Felix/Seo Changbin
Series: a kiss... as in ...? [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1221701
Comments: 8
Kudos: 161





	I was scared of heights before I fell for you

**Author's Note:**

> hi this was supposed to be posted on oct 31st for changlix day but shit happened so. here she is fashionably late. please enjoy
> 
> Thanks to emily for betaing and being a life saver
> 
> Title taken from Letting Go by One Ok Rock

“So they just turn back? For no reason?”

“Well it wasn’t initially for no reason-”

“-but now it is.”

Felix releases a frustrated sound, glaring when Changbin throws him a cheeky grin, clearly trying to wind him up. 

“At least we get an extra hour of sleep in the winter,” Felix attempts.

“Which you lose in summer,” Changbin retorts, and Felix, with no other argument to offer, stuffs his mouth with more chips. “Aren’t you glad you moved to a country that doesn’t flip clocks back and forth for farmers that don’t even care anymore?” Changbin continues to tease.

“Time is just a social construct anyway.” Felix mumbles. 

“If time is just a social construct, why did you get so huffy when I forgot our anniversary date last month?”

“Because that’s important!”

Changbin is grinning again, and Felix quickly tries to relax his shoulders and school his expression into something that doesn’t look like a scowl. Felix is well aware of the way Changbin is constantly amused at Felix getting worked up over things. 

Changbin seems to be having fun already however, as he nudges himself closer to Felix, making him instinctively take a step back. 

“It’s important, huh?”

Felix rolls his eyes, though their proximity is starting to make him nervous. He may have been dating Changbin for two years now, but that doesn’t mean his heart beats any slower whenever Changbin gets too close. 

“Of course it’s important.”

A smile flickers on Changbin’s lips, gone within an instant, authenticity replaced with cheekiness once more. 

“Aww,” Changbin coos, “You’re so sweet Yongbokkie.” 

Felix bites at the finger that Changbin tries to poke his cheeks with, grinning when Changbin reels back in surprise. 

“You know I bite,” Felix shrugs when Changbin starts to pout. 

“Kiss it better.”

Felix stares at the finger that Changbin shoves in his face, barely a scratch on it. Admittedly, it’s slightly red, but Felix had only nipped at it, not even enough to break skin, so clearly Changbin is doing what he’s best at- being overdramatic. 

_ “Kiss it better,”  _ Changbin begins to whine when Felix only continues to look at him with an unimpressed expression. 

Felix tries his hardest not to smile,

“Don’t be a baby, hyung.” He bites at his lip, avoiding Changbin’s gaze, “You’re barely hurt.”

“My pride is wounded,” Changbin sniffs, “The  _ least  _ you can do is kiss me better.”

Felix huffs, rolling his eyes and pressing his lips into a very thin line, a terribly fake act of pretending that this is something he totally does not want to do. Truth be told, Felix would run to the ends of the earth, and back, for Seo Changbin, but Seo Changbin’s ego does not need to be any larger than it already is, so Felix is holding back on telling him that fact.

_ “Fine,”  _ Felix sighs, catching Changbin’s finger in his palm. Changbin  _ squeals,  _ like he just won a million dollar prize, bouncing on the balls of his feet as Felix brings his finger to his lips. 

Gently, and ever so softly, Felix presses a light kiss to the tip of Changbin’s finger, laughing at Changbin’s expression when he pulls away.

Before Felix can pull away completely however, Changbin grips him by the wrists, pulling him back in and pressing a kiss straight to Felix’s lips. Felix pulls away, shocked, lips tingling and head whirring.

_ “Hyung,”  _ he whines, and Changbin simply giggles, burying his head into Felix’s shoulder.

“You’re welcome, Lixie.” 

\--

The floorboards creak beneath Felix’s feet, despite him walking on the edge of his toes in a pair of his softest socks. He  _ really  _ isn’t in the mood to wake any of his members in the dead of the night, especially considering this is one of the only days of the week where they’ll actually get to sleep. 

Felix had turned in early for the night, awakening five or so hours later to find his throat ridiculously dry and in need of a drink. It’s not a secret that Felix is afraid of the dark, so getting out of bed and facing it really was a final option- that he came to after fishing around on his nightstand only to find his water bottle completely empty.

The lights in the rest of the dorm are switched off, and Felix can hear Chan snoring down the hallway, as well as soft mumbles coming from Minho’s room. Felix knows they have a few light sleepers in the group, who grumble and groan at the slightest hint of light, so with his phone in hand Felix stumbles through the dorm, hoping he doesn’t step on a stray plug or slip on one of Hyunjin’s books he likes to leave lying on the living room floor. 

Felix is very close to the kitchen, so close to getting there in complete silence with no mishaps, and he’s pretty proud of himself, knowing that as soon as he reaches the kitchen he can flick the switch on, fill up his bottle, and stumble back to the safety of his room.

It doesn’t go that simply.

When Felix reaches the kitchen, he sees there’s already a light on, though not the main light, more of a dim glow that seems to be  _ moving.  _ Felix gulps. He’s really not prepared to encounter something supernatural at two in the morning. 

Slowly, Felix inches closer to the doorway, phone gripped tightly in his hand in case he has to throw it at a ghost or- or something.

A figure in black is moving around by the counter, the light seeming to come  _ from  _ them and Felix, having watched one too many horror films, decides to scream.

The figure jumps in surprise, and suddenly Felix is no longer screaming, because his whole oxygen supply is being cut off so he can’t even  _ breathe  _ let alone yell for help. He thrashes in the grip of whatever holds him tightly, but it’s stronger than him and a lot firmer. Felix feels his phone clatter to the ground, the flashlight bouncing off the ceiling, so the kitchen is now bathed in two sets of light, until suddenly the main switch is turned on and the whole kitchen lights up.

_ “Lixie?”  _

Felix whips around, eyes narrowing when he sees a lost Changbin standing by the wall, completely bewildered in a black hoodie and shorts. Felix releases a slow breath.

“Hyung?” He whispers, not trusting his voice, “What are you doing?”

“I woke up for a snack- what the heck are  _ you  _ doing?”

“I needed a drink.” Felix lamely holds up the water bottle still sitting tight in his grip.

“And why did you start screaming bloody murder when you came in here?” Changbin moves away from the wall to climb up onto the counter, pulling out some snack bars from the top shelf of a cupboard.

“I thought you were a ghost,” Felix admits sheepishly. Changbin starts to laugh then, and Felix can’t help but join in, albeit a little shakily. 

“Which ghost fixes themselves a snack at 2am?” Changbin teases as he turns back around, feet dangling off the edge of the counter. 

Felix retreats his phone from the floor and pockets it, then places his bottle onto the kitchen table, a smile playing on his lips as he approaches his boyfriend on the counter. He fits perfectly between Changbin’s legs, hands sliding over Changbin’s warm thighs, fingers tapping on the bare skin.

“I have a broad imagination, okay?” Felix tries to defend, though it’s obvious neither of them are directly interested in the conversation anymore.

There’s a cheeky glint in Changbin’s eyes, tongue poking at his lips, almost daring, as he watches Felix contemplate his next move. Felix simply continues to squeeze at Changbin’s thighs, not seductively, simply appreciating the ripple of the muscle under his fingertips, the warmth of Changbin’s skin, the softness of his body. 

“Kiss me,” Changbin murmurs, so soft, so sweet in the moonlight, Felix barely hears it. 

“I can’t reach you up there,” Felix whispers, just as soft, just as teasing. 

Changbin pouts, 

“Yes you  _ can.”  _

Felix watches him for a moment, studies the way Changbin looks slightly ruffled in the dark, eyes drooping a little as he clearly fights to stay awake. Felix knows Changbin is beautiful in the day, when he shines under the sun and clear blue skies, but he’s softly pretty when he’s bathing in the moonlight, when he becomes one with the stars. 

Slowly, Felix inches onto the tips of his toes and, with a little leverage from the counter top, manages to reach Changbin, who crouches a little, allowing their lips to meet softly. 

Changbin often kisses Felix like he can never let go, like he’ll never pull away and they’ll be attached to one another forever, but at two in the morning, when time feels like nothing and only the moon is there to witness them, they can kiss without the worry of ever being separated. 

Changbin at two in the morning kisses Felix like he’s the only person worth kissing on the planet, and Felix kisses back exactly the same. When they pull away, they’re neither flushed nor panting like they usually are during midday kisses or evening kisses, instead there’s simply soft gazes passed between them, and Felix almost feels  _ embarrassed  _ at how intimate it is.

“Come on,” Changbin says eventually as he hops down from the counter, “Let’s go to bed.” 

\--

The wood of the door is uncomfortable against Felix’s back, but it’s the last thing on his mind since he was pushed against it, a pair of large hands tugging at the bottom of his shirt and a pair of familiar lips eagerly pressed against his own. 

“I missed you,” Changbin breathes pulling back for barely a second before capturing his boyfriend’s lips once more. Felix tightens his hold on the elder’s neck, kissing back just as enthusiastically.

Kissing Changbin like this is like breathing the flames of a burning fire, Felix feels like he’s allowed them to consume his entire being until he’s left numb to his toes, the only thing engraved in his mind is  _ Changbin Changbin Changbin,  _ his very being overtaking Felix’s every thought. Changbin kisses like he’ll never be able to tell Felix he loves him ever again and he must show it through this very action alone- like he must put all his passion and intensity into every kiss to make it worthwhile. And it’s nice, it’s pleasant, but Felix sometimes feels like he needs to remind the other that he’s  _ right there,  _ and he isn’t going anywhere until he’s told to.

“Babe,” Felix says softly, forcing them to part, “Breathe,”

Changbin looks confused for a moment before he laughs, pressing their foreheads together,

“Sorry,” he mutters, grin still tracing his lips, “I just missed you.”

“It was only a week.” 

“I  _ missed  _ you,” Changbin insists, but he‘s looking more relaxed now, more content now that he knows Felix isn’t going anywhere. 

“I missed you too,” Felix admits, then gently begins to pull Changbin away from the door and towards his bed, forcing his boyfriend to  _ sit  _ before he captures Felix’s lips with his own once more.

“Tell me,” Felix gasps between kisses, “How was your trip?”

Changbin groans playfully, but pulls away nonetheless- because Felix knows, if there’s one thing Changbin could enjoy more than kissing his boyfriend, it’s talking about music.

“It was good. Met some talented people.” Changbin rolls over onto his back, so they’re lying side by side. 

“Bet none of them were as talented as you.”

Changbin snorts, turning his head a little to press a soft kiss to Felix’s temple. Felix feels his eyes slip shut at the gentle gesture.

“Nah these were like-  _ super  _ skilled guys.”

“You’re a super skilled guy,” Felix insists, but his eyes are still closed and Changbin’s lips are still hovering by his head, so the words come out lazy and slightly sleep-ridden, instead of forceful like he wanted them to.

“I’m a lucky guy,” Changbin murmurs, rolling onto his side and throwing an arm over Felix’s waist. He pulls him as close as possible, then presses another kiss to the side of his head, lingering a few seconds longer this time. “God,” Changbin inhales deeply, “I missed you so much.”

“It was only a week, hyung,” Felix repeats, voice small and laced with confusion. 

“I’m really not used to spending even twenty-four hours without you,” Changbin admits quietly. He pulls away, and Felix slowly blinks his eyes open. Changbin is looking at him intently, and Felix can’t find it within himself to look away. “I don’t think you know, Lixie, how much you mean to me. I- shit, I really can’t live without you.”

Felix pulls away a little, fingers tracing down the side of Changbin’s face. He’s never seen his boyfriend this vulnerable, despite Changbin never hesitating to be open with his feelings, always being candid and straight to the point when it comes to emotions, Felix feels like he’s truly seeing Changbin in his rawest form for the first time.

“Don’t be silly, hyung,” Felix whispers, noticing the way Changbin leans into his touch, “You lived fine without me until you met me.”

A smile flickers on Changbin’s lips, and Felix is glad, afraid that Changbin may have been about to cry.

“Yeah,” Changbin sighs, “I did. But- but now, now that I know what it’s like- to have you and hold you and  _ love  _ you- I don’t want there to ever be a time where I can’t do all of those things.” Changbin pauses, licks his lips and uses a finger to tilt Felix’s chin so he’s looking into his eyes once more. “I don’t think you know how much you mean to me,” he repeats.

Felix responds in the only way he knows how. Gently cradling Changbin’s jaw, Felix leans forward until their lips are pressed together, keeping the kiss as soft as possible. Changbin doesn’t prod at Felix’s lips with his tongue like he usually does, and Felix doesn’t scrape his teeth across Changbin’s bottom lip like  _ he  _ usually does, instead they simply feel, feel what it’s like to have their lips move gently across each other’s, as if they are merely pieces of a jigsaw puzzle finally slotting together. 

When they pull back, Changbin is still staring at Felix with the same intensity he had before they started kissing, and it compels Felix to lean forward once more and press a feather-light kiss to Changbin’s lips before he pulls away once more. 

“Hyung,” He starts, not bothering to clear his throat despite his words coming out slightly scratchy, “I  _ do  _ know. Only because you mean just that much to me too.”

Changbin responds in the only way he knows how, and in the way Felix loves best. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to everyone who sent in ideas, most (if not all) of these were ideas from readers which I was super grateful for so thank you. If anyone has any more (sfw) places for Changbin and Felix to smooch each other then please don't hesitate to share :D 
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/feiixseo) and [cc](https://curiouscat.me/felixseo)


End file.
